Steps & Leaps

This last week I “celebrated” my 46th year of life. I didn’t really have a big ‘ole party. I haven’t had a big ‘ole party in many many years. I went to eat with some friends. I ordered a meal that took me 3 meals to eat! Talk about a cheap date. I had some broiled chicken and baked potato (with dry milk to add protein). Someone at work asked me if I felt a year older. I said, “Actually, I feel younger than I have in years.”

I have a problem that is nice. I am having a hard time finding clothes to fit. I have exhausted my reserve sizes. The pants I began to wear last week will probably be too big in another week. My shirts are already too big. My big event for tomorrow is to go through my closet and clear out all the BIG shirts and see what I have to choose from. I have a friend that gave me some smaller sizes, but I probably won’t be able to wear them for another week or two. So I got on line and ordered some clothes. I found some clearance items for good prices. I ordered for my current size and the next size down. Pants that I am satisfied with are the tough thing to find. It is also hard because I’m not sure what size I really am. I guess I need to go to the store and pick a few sizes, styles, types of material, etc. And see what fits. I just hate to shop. I also hate to spend full price for clothes I will only wear for 2 weeks or so. I went to the Goodwill store today and tried on 37 pieces of clothing and bought 3. For someone who hates shopping that was like the torture chambers! The only consolation was one of the shirts I bought has a Mickey Mouse on it and I got it for $3.69.

Today my chiropractor teased me and said he was taking up a donation to buy me suspenders. The pants I had on were a “little” big! I laughed and asked what he was going to do for my shirts. My pants are big in the butt-end and legs because they have to be so large for the waist size. I hope for that to resolve as I exercise and my waist decreases. He asked if I had a certain amount of weight I had to lose in a certain time period. I said there are no hard set rules, but my surgeon would like me to lose 15-20 pounds in the next 6 weeks. I lost 10 last month, so I feel 15-20 is do-able. That is 3 a week. As I continue to increase my exercising, it will help.

I have been going to the “Y” and exercising. Today I implemented some “bar bell weight resistance” exercises in my water exercising. I am hoping it will help tone the sagging belly muscles and decrease my waist. Tomorrow I will go to the gym side at the “Y”. I have a routine with the bike, ARC, weight resistance and exercise ball. I also walk around the track. Last week I made it 1/3 of a mile. Before surgery I could walk about 1/26th of a mile. I want to work up to ½ a mile by week’s end. My feet and back are what used to keep me from walking. This last week they did real well with the 1/3 mile.

Today I had difficulty with eating. Not that it upset my stomach. I just couldn’t find anything that “tasted good”. It seemed like everything I thought I wanted wasn’t “tasty” to me. I settled for about 3 ounces of chicken and ½ a cup of cottage cheese for lunch. For supper I had a can of tuna with dill weed and lite mayo and 1 ounce of cheese with a few multi-grain crackers. I told mom I didn’t know what I was hungry for. I said, “It is hard to be hungry for anything when you are never hungry.” I eat just because I know I need to for my body, healing and health. I could probably go all day and never eat anything. I try to make what I eat high in protein. I asked mom tonight if we could have hamburger gravy tomorrow. She asked if I thought I should. I said I didn’t know why not. We could use my milk (½ 1% & ½ skim) and we could put a scoop of my UnJury unflavored protein powder in it. We could put protein powder in the mashed potatoes. I think maybe that would taste good to me.

At work last week I saw a co-worker that only works part-time. She hadn’t seen me since before surgery. She emailed me about 2 weeks ago and said she wasn’t sure she wanted to see me yet. She wanted to be amazed and surprised when she saw me. Well, she walked in and I was on the opposite side of the room so she couldn’t see me. She got settled in. One of the employees of the police department brought 2 pieces of cake. He felt bad because there were 3 of us and he only brought 2 pieces. I said not to worry I didn’t eat that anymore. Anyway, my co-worker said, “I haven’t seen you yet.” I asked if she was going to keep her eyes closed all shift. I said, “I doubt you are going to be amazed.” I got up and walked over to her. She was amazed! She made me feel so good! Her reaction was one of amazement, thrill and huge support. I told her last week was the 1st I had actually started to feel like I had lost weight. My face, hands, wrists, knees and ankles have shown the weight loss, but it wasn’t until last week I really felt like my waist was smaller. She said she noticed it in the waist and legs. She thought I looked smaller even height wise. I told her we were measuring the pounds not the height. It sure made me feel good! I know I look different because I used my credit card 2 weeks ago and the clerk asked to see some ID. I gave her my driver’s license. She looked at it, then at me, then at it, then at me and I said, “I know it doesn’t look the same. I’ve lost 41 pounds.” She said, “You are right. It doesn’t look like you. Congratulations!” That felt good! It as been this last week I have also felt like I have more energy. I can remember when I dreaded getting up to exercise because after I did I was dragging. Now it seems like the exercising gives me energy. I still hate getting up at 7am to be at water aerobics at 8am and 8am to be at the gym by 9am. Once I am there, it feels good! I never thought I would say that!

As of Saturday (weigh-in day) I have lost 46 pounds total with 31 of them being since surgery 8 weeks ago today! I went to the doctor for my monthly B-12 shot last Friday. I always weigh myself there so my medical records show my weight. I have been waiting an eternity (okay maybe not quite that long, but it’s felt like it) to be able to get on that scale and not have to put the bottom weight on 250. It felt so good to leave it on 200. Now to watch the top one go down from 246. Only 47 more pounds and I can put the bottom weight on 150!!! I know I am getting ahead of myself, but as the quotation at the bottom of this entry says; “small steps”. It is a goal! It is a realistic one to shoot for. If I can do 20 pounds in 6 weeks I will be half way there. That makes it a “small steps to big leaps” attainable goal!

I hope you map out your goals and take those small steps towards the big leaps.


Small steps are one of the most powerful ways
to make big leaps.
~Melissa McCreery, PhD~