Celebration

My youngest great nephew, Talon (BKA – Better Known As – Bubby) and I share something. We are the same age. He turned 2 the 15th. I will turn 2 the 21st. Yes it will be 2 years since my surgery and new life. I am the healthiest I have been in far too many years. I am the lightest weight I have been in over 20 years.
Saturday we had a 2nd birthday party for my sweet great nephew. He opened his gifts and giggled and played and enjoyed the day as only a 2 year old can. Life is full of such wonderment to him and few worries. As he gets older he will take on more responsibilities. Some by his own choosing (tie my shoes, pick out my clothes, “I do it!”) Some by default. As you get older more is expected of you in order to survive in this world.

Well, I face many of the same feelings, emotions and expectations as Talon does. I am scared at times I am not eating right, exercising enough, living to the fullest. I feel happy for my progress. I am excited to work towards my new goals for the next 5 months. At my 2 year check up my surgeon told me many people at the 2 year mark gain weight. They begin to feel the old hunger pains. They are more relaxed in their journey. They can expand their pouch. Therefore it is even more important to keep my portion sizes to the minimum, chose the right foods and watch my calorie intake. This is true for anyone regardless of having gastric bypass surgery, but more so for me. Therefore my expectations need to be positive so I can keep myself focused on what is truly important. He was surprised I am still losing inches and decreasing in clothing sizes. I am working harder today than I was 6 months ago and it is paying off. He asked me what happened. I assumed he was referring to the fact I have lost 18.8 pounds in the last 6 months. I told him I got focused and serious. He said “Again.” It was a statement and not a question or an accusation. It felt good to know I am focused on myself and what I need and it shows. My surgeon is not easy to impress.

In the past few months I have addressed being positive, keeping focused, trusting God, grieving and growing, reflecting and many other dimensions of life. Through it all God has been the constant steady for me. The more I turn to Him the more peace I feel. Just as Talon feels at peace because of how his mom and dad, sister and grandma provide for him, I feel at peace when I acknowledge what God does for me. I turn to Him and he blesses. I can sit down and write my blessing list and it would be very lengthy. You would be listed on it. Your support through this 2 year journey has meant the world to me. Most of you are silent supporters. Some of you are very vocal and let me know I am doing good. Thank you. I still need that encouragement.

I was reminded today of some of those blessings. I was able to join in the fun of the celebration. I can remember a time and see pictures in my mind of me being present but not a part of the happenings. I was physically taking up space but wasn’t involved in the joy of the celebration. Today as I thought about what was happening and how I was relating I thanked God. For the 1st time in more years than I can remember I was able to participate. I held Talon and Makayla (my 2 ½ year old great niece) up to take a swing at a piñata. BS (before surgery) I wouldn’t have been able to do that. I was able to show my oldest great nephew how to swing a golf club more effectively. I’m no golf pro, but it sure helped him. BS I wouldn’t have even cared to be involved. As I said, I was present, but I wasn’t a participant. I have pictures that show that. I hope today’s involvement with them will be memories they will cherish. I was able to help in the kitchen. BS I would have sat and watched because I didn’t feel well enough to care. Yes, BS was a time of numbness. 2 years out and I am learning to enjoy life with childlike eyes sometimes.

I still have my days, as everyone does in their journey of life. But I adapt to those days much easier. As I progress in this new lifestyle, I pray my “brain-frame” will be set more on God. I pray I will keep remembering what it was like over 2 years ago and what it is like now. I pray I will keep track of what I used to not be able to do and what I can do now. I pray I continue to be refreshed by those accomplishments and challenged to attain new accomplishments. As Talon grows and matures and becomes more independent, I pray he keeps his childlike eyes and enjoys life and keeps himself healthy.

Happy Birthday Talon!
Happy Girthday DeAnn! (Girth = distance around something: the distance around something thick and cylindrical such as a tree trunk or somebody's waist)

May your character not be a writing upon the sand, but an inscription upon the rock!
~ Charles Spurgeon~